Bearin' it with Mike I Don`t want to grow up So many people I know and have talked to lately have been thrown into a role in their lives that have changed their lives in ways they may have never imagined, or may have not been prepared for. They are faced with the stark reality that we have somehow been forced to grow up and be responsible adults. To make someone else’s decisions for them and to be a caretaker to the very one that was supposed to take care of them. It is not a pleasant path to take but who ever said life always has to be pleasant ? I am talking about the role reversal of a child or grandchild taking care of a parent or grandparent. Life is going along smoothly and you think the world is your oyster. There are dinners, parties, friends to meet for good times and trips to be planned and taken. Then l ike a ton of bricks falling from the sky, you are faced with the proposition of a role reversal that does not fit into your life as you have known it. When faced with this there are very different plans you have to make that may affect your way of life for sometime. A very good friend of mine has been faced with such a dilemma by having to care for his mother who has Alzheimers. For the past two years he has been a trooper having the bulk of the care to handle himself. It is a tough road to walk, and it now has come to having to get a helping hand. Another friend in Raleigh , NC
Bearin' it with Mike
I Don`t want to grow up
So many people I know and have talked to lately have been thrown into a role in their lives that have changed their lives in ways they may have never imagined, or may have not been prepared for. They are faced with the stark reality that we have somehow been forced to grow up and be responsible adults. To make someone else’s decisions for them and to be a caretaker to the very one that was supposed to take care of them. It is not a pleasant path to take but who ever said life always has to be pleasant ? I am talking about the role reversal of a child or grandchild taking care of a parent or grandparent.
Life is going along smoothly and you think the world is your oyster. There are dinners, parties, friends to meet for good times and trips to be planned and taken. Then l ike a ton of bricks falling from the sky, you are faced with the proposition of a role reversal that does not fit into your life as you have known it. When faced with this there are very different plans you have to make that may affect your way of life for sometime.
A very good friend of mine has been faced with such a dilemma by having to care for his mother who has Alzheimers. For the past two years he has been a trooper having the bulk of the care to handle himself. It is a tough road to walk, and it now has come to having to get a helping hand. Another friend in Raleigh , NC
I have joked several times that as gay men, we are more prone to be handed these tasks because the conception is that we are single, have no children to care for, and our lives are footloose and fancy free. Meanwhile, our siblings that are married with children to raise and husbands to feed and care for, and soccer games to attend, and laundry to do and cleaning and …you get my point. Just because we do not have a uterus and did not produce, we all of a sudden become the decision makers and caregivers.
Everyone I know that I have mentioned do not regret a single moment of it. You do what you have to do to care and make safe the ones you love. It is a scary and long venture that like I said, none of us were prepared for, but we can all rest assured that we have done everything humanly possible to make sure the lives of the ones we love have been protected and cared for. So if you or someone you know has been faced with such a turning point, be there for them, love them and if you have it, give a shoulder to lean on. And remember, its not easy to grow up.